Technology and Viruses

Times use to be a lot simpler. It used to be that when you brought home a TV dinner from the store, you preheated the oven (or not), and then stuck it in there to cook for 25-28 minutes (or until fully cooked). Then technology came along and we had microwaves. We ooh'd and aah'd over how quickly our meals were hot and ready to eat. Then one day we were extra hungry, so instead of the regular TV dinner, we bought a Hungry Man meal. And in our technology driven impatience get irritated that we are now spending almost 10 whole minutes or more for our meal to be ready instead of the 5 to 6 it takes for the normal sized TV dinners. Who knew that getting your old fashioned TV dinner into your mouth 20 almost 20 minutes quicker than it was when you were growing up would be a source of great consternation? Never mind the fact that you just took a big bite of the mashed potatoes straight away and spent 5 minutes with a stupid look on your face, your mouth open trying to suck in air, along with a cold drink because the mashed potatoes were so damned hot you thought you were going to set your mouth on fire!

Back in the 90's we were lucky to find a friend with the internet in his home. With that dial-up connection that kept telemarketers from bothering you, and you had access to all kinds of information without having to go to the library anymore was just so great. The technology came along and created broadband and high speed connections, which meant even more information coming even quicker. Then you go back home and see your parents in po-dunk nowhere, where the internet is still dial-up and you find yourself pissed off because your stupid friggin email won't load fast enough. You logged on at 8am, and sometime around noon you'll be able to see just how many emails you have in your inbox. It'll be 1pm or better before you even think about reading the first one, of 50! The damned post office could get correspondence between you and a friend faster than this stupid dial-up internet stuff! Hell the Pony Express could come back, pick up your handwritten documents in Maine and have them to your cousin in California, and return with a handwritten reply by the time your stupid email finally is accessible! And God forbid you clicked the wrong link... It'll be next Wednesday before you figure out what you did and get back to where you wanted to go online.

So you go back home, where you have your high speed internet, and you log into your email only to find the page loading even slower than it was on your parents dial-up connection. Apparently your porn viewing habits led you to a few viruses. Now everything you try to do on your computer only further bogs it down until it quits working altogether. And you know, you just know, that when you call in some tech support help, both over the phone and the in your home repair guy, that they are laughing to themselves about your porn addiction. They're going to run some tests and find out you have some oddly coded error that clearly points to your Goat in High Heels Porn fetish websites...you really are a sick bastard by the way, but hey, it's your money buddy!

As some of you know, I have acquired a cell phone in the past couple months. Something I swore I'd never do, and yet, I now ashamedly admit that it is convenient, especially since I don't have a land line anymore. Most people are probably thinking at this point, who needs a land line when you have a cell phone? Well, stuff it! I'm a bit old-fashioned, and I liked it that way. This is only changing out of necessity. Or at least that's what I'm telling myself. Although if I get a lower sperm count down the road, or get some brain cancer from irradiation out of my cell phone, CEOs, and a few dear cell-phone carrying friends of mine will surely die before I do...by my hands!

Then you have the capability to link your phone number and the internet together. I'm not talking about intertwining their separate functions together somehow, although I'm sure that can be done, but it's way above my pay grade to know how. I'm talking about how you can post someone's personal information online. Like your own.
Sometimes out of a perceived necessity, desperate times call for desperate measures. So, I'm going to expose myself a bit here purely for your entertainment at my expense.

Anyways, so there is this guy, we'll call "Craig", who made an online list that you can post ads on, as well as reply to other ads. You can post a notice of a garage sale you're having, or if you want to buy or sell your home, or you can do none of those and post an ad that you are on the meat market, or reply to an ad about somebody else who put themselves on the meat market. And with a little bit of luck two perfectly good strangers can hook up and satisfy whatever needs or desires they wish to have fulfilled. Because hey, whats a good time and a couple of painful and possibly incurable STDs between strangers? Now I'm not saying I did this, but I'm also not not saying I did this.

Okay so I did this (Clearly I would never outlast any enhanced interrogation techniques by trained operatives). After a long relationship with at least semi-regular adultish activity (sex for those of you who couldn't follow my drift), it has been a long dry spell for me. Being put in a position of non-attachment, I figured what the hell. So I posted an ad and provided my contact information right there online in the form of my cellphone number in the event people wanted to bypass the more anonymous email replies. The email replies were pretty dumb. Mostly just some lame ass person trying to get you to sign up to some dating/sex/webcam website and pay money for a fantasy in your own head that you could've done with less effort before you end up just taking matters into your own hands so to speak and applying a bit of elbow grease...um, or something...

However, some real people seem to exist and reply to your ads. Some thru the email system, but a few end up texting me on my phone. SCORE!!! Mookie is in business! Well, sort of but not really. Had a few females on the line for a moment or two, but then they mysteriously disappeared without a trace... Oh well, guess you can't miss what you never had. Then I got a text one night just after I get off work, and its another female. And she sends a picture to my phone. I'm staring at a midget looking troll of a woman. Look, yes, I'm desperate for a little action, but c'mon, even a guy with face made for radio has some standards. Maybe that makes me shallow, but ask me if I care. I had a hot wife, and I'm only going to lower my standards so far before I say thanks but no thanks. And then she starts texting dirty to me...ugh! I just ignored it, as by this time I'm trying to drive the icy streets of Des Moines to do my job. I don't need the stimulation of what this troll must look like when stimulated with a little battery operated device to aid her....BLECH!

But then I get this other text another time... Things are progressing decently, and the person wants to meet me, and SOON! Details are worked out...logistically anyways. I forgot to ask a couple VERY important questions of a person who found me via the internet. Like say, a facial pic? And maybe ACTUAL Gender???? I posted on a men for women. I was naive enough to believe that only women would respond. When I'm getting close to this person's house, I sent them a text letting them know. Then the answer to one unanswered question is offered up with the simple reply: "I'm a guy."

WELL NOW! I whipped a u-turn and reversed course. Look, if you're gay, that's fine. Be gay, and have a good time with it. But don't be looking to hook and turn a straight guy out. Have some common fucking courtesy for pete's sake! I informed the guy that now the "she" I thought he was turned out to be a he, I was out. He then attempted to justify the okayedness of him performing an oratorical performance for me. (It's only..., and No one will have to know...)

Yeah no thanks. I'LL know, and that's too many people that don't want to know. Again I have no problem with gay people. Some really good friends of mine are gay. I'm happy for them, and we all accept each other for who we are and what our preferences in life might be. However, the way this dude led me on as though he was a female almost all the way up to his doorstep...well to hell with being PC, that is outright faggotry in the most evil and despicable way. And yes, I said faggotry. You don't like it, tough, deal with it, I'm not here to avoid offending people. There are gay people and there are faggots. And a gay person trying to turn out a straight guy with a bit of deception followed by trying to reason it out as to why it should happen anyways...that's a faggot, plain and simple. They have a men for men section, and women for women section. If you want to go to the list made by Craig to get in on the meat market action to find someone of your gender, you have those options plainly listed. I'm just glad for both me and that guy that he didn't let me ring the doorbell to his house. Because he would have at least ended up in the hospital and I in jail. And no, before anyone mentions the idea of Mookie committing a hate crime, no it isn't a hate crime. He would be beaten for his deceptive and lying ways, not his sexual orientation. I still shudder a bit thinking about it, but it is my own idiocy that got me there. IF I should choose to go the route of trying to obtain some meaningless satisfaction with another willing adult participant through the same medium, I will most definitely be requesting the gender AND pictorial proof of this. And even then, I may drag a buddy along with me just to make sure its kosher at the meet up.

SO yeah, technology is wonderful, but it can lead down some bad roads if you choose to go those routes...at least I didn't pick up a virus along the way

Technology As A Tool Of Anti-Mookism

WARNING!!!! This post may contain some inappropriate language and attitude within the contents. Those who are prone to picking up a stick and beating random people after reading displeasing material should just stop reading now. For the rest of you, well, you've been warned.

As I have mentioned before, I am the target of many conspiracies to hold me back. In fact some of you who read this refuse to add yourselves onto my blog as official followers or to comment openly (there is an option to post comments anonymously without logging in, you know). I can only assume it is because you have heard or know of these conspiracies, and you don't wish to be targeted or have members of your families circumcised merely for your associations with or to me.

I'm pretty sure the UN is part of the grand anti-mookist conspiracy

Well, the grand conspirators have struck at the Mook again!!! Last year there was a fake virus warning that was in fact itself a virus. Clicking on anything pretty much guaranteed your computer was going to be infected and you could do nothing. This happened to my mother's computer. My brother-in-law used his laptop to figure out how to take care of the problem. Then mere weeks later, our computer became infected while I was online. I got into contact with my brother in law, and after 2 to 3 hours we got things fixed. All was good, that is, until yesterday. The bastards struck again while I was online researching information and reading news articles. In fact I didn't even get a warning. Some random pop-up appeared and I merely tried to close it. The computer went into some sort of delay, then a balloon showed up from my task bar saying a virus has been detected, blah blah blah, and then the antivirus window popped up and things went crazy. Just the latest example of a wave of anti-Mookism that has infected the power structure of our world.

Naturally I called down to my sister's place. They don't admit to it, but they are Mookist sympathizers, so I knew I could get help from there. Unfortunately for me, my sister informed me that her husband was at work, so it was going to have to wait. I called my wife and let her know of the situation, and she contacted them last night to get the computer straightened out.



I was informed by my wife after getting up for work that the computer was in fact all fixed up now. I was also told in a frustrated and unjokingly joking manner that if it happens again while I'm online I'll be banned from the computer save when adult supervision is available to monitor my activities. Even with the adult supervision, my activities would be severely curbed. Probably limited to checking but not actually reading my email and getting to play minesweeper or solitaire, games that aren't connected to the Internet.

Of course this is what the grand conspirators are counting on. By curtailing my access to information and being able to disseminate that information along with my own high brow intellect out to the world, they can keep Mookism confined to my household instead of to the masses who deserve to hear sane messages (save these crazy blogs of mine anyways) and have better options for leadership in this world (like mine...remember to write me in for President in 2016!).

For there sake, these anti-Mookist conspirators had better hope I never find them. As a matter of fact let's just go ahead and include anyone who plugs nasty viruses into the cyber world to mess up people's computers and lives. If I do find these people, I have great plans for them.

While I am normally mild mannered, this kind of crap really pisses me off to a degree which none of you can possibly fathom. (Hell, I get overwhelmingly irritated about open cabinets or refrigerator foods being left out. much more so than I should be over something so dumb) Most of you know I'm pretty ardently "anti-electric technology". I hate phones, cell phones, texting, voicemail, ipads, etc, etc. But I do like my computer and what limited things I am able to do with it. I can write my blogs, check and answer my emails, read other blogs, research stuff, write my books, play games and all that. These are the kinds of things I do to entertain myself during the day while being at home alone. I am a man of routine. Ask my wife, interrupting my routine is NOT a good thing. And these conspirators/virus hacking engineers, whatever you call them REALLY ruined my routine.

I just hope someday I run into one of these guys who does this stuff to amuse themselves. I hope he is drunk and just looking for someone to socialize with and blabbers about doing this stuff. And I will be his best friend for the moment. I'll be more than happy to give his drunken ass a ride "home". But when he wakes up, he will find himself tied down to a table. And there will be me, the mad scientist, armed with multiple syringes of adrenaline, a funnel, and a nice vat of corrosive acid.

RE-WARNING: THIS NEXT PART IS CRIMINALLY INSANE...LAST CHANCE TO TURN AWAY!!!



I will pour the acid all over the evil bastard's daddy parts, starting right down the guy's pee hole, with the funnel, and let it burn in real good, dissolving all the important stuff. I will be injecting the guy with adrenaline to keep him from passing out from the shock of it all. And then I will make sure he lives, so that he will remember it, and he will be made to know exactly why such a fate befell him. If it's a girl that does this hideous crap that messes with people's computers and/or steals their identity ruining their lives and all that, she'll get the same treatment.

Now, full disclosure here, this is all some evil fantasy in my mind. Its the kind of stuff I think these morons deserve, but is in no way the premonition of some criminally insane plot by me. It is however something I obviously wouldn't do in real life, but I'm free to imagine it. And also a legal disclaimer, I do not condone this actual activity in any way shape or form, and furthermore I refuse to be held accountable in the event some complete moron actually goes and does this. We've seen the acid-based disfigurement of people in movies before, so it's not like this is some original idea of mine. You're free to think whatever you want, just don't act upon it.